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Stoner quotes

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"Marijuana is harmless"    

"Pot activist is an oxy-moron"    

"Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly"

"He who stands on toilet, is high on pot"    

"Life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life so lets get wasted and have the time of our life!"

"An empty bowl needs to be filled and a full bowl needs to be emptied"

"Roll, roll, roll a joint, pass it down the line, take a toke, inhale the smoke, now yer feelin fine"
 
Stoners live and stoners die, in the end we all get high.
 
If in life you dont succeed, F the world and smoke some weed.

Life's a btch and then you die, so fck the world and lets get high
 
"Be Glad You Got What You Got When You Get What You Get Because Besides What You Got You Ain't Gettin' SHIT"... (make of that what u will)
"The Luck is Gone, The Brain is Shot, But the Liquor we still got!!!"
 
"A friend with weed is a friend indeed, A friend without weed is a friend you don't need." 
 
Mary had a little bud, It was tight and green, And everywhere that Mary went They had to clean the screen" 
"God made grass, man made booze, who do you trust???????
"Life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life so let's get wasted and have the time of our life!" 
"When the go gest weird, the weird turns pro." 
 
When I'm dead & in my grave, No more pot & whiskey will I crave, On my tombstone it shall be seen. Here lie the bones of a smoking machine." 
"An empty bowl needs to be filled and a full bowl needs to be emptied." 

"If you are not wasted, then the day is." 

"Dude, I know why we can't sleep.. Because our pupils are so big that our eyelids can't fit over them." 

Reality is an illusion created by marijuana deficiency." -TA 

When in trouble ,when in doubt smoke a joint and mellow out." 

AND NOW FOR SOME RANDOM DUMBASS QUOTES
 
"Outside consultants sought for test of gas chamber."
- Ad in Arizona Republic

"Golden, Ripe, Boneless Bananas, 39 Cents A Pound."
- Ad in the "Missoulian" by Orange Street Food Farm

"FOR RENT: CONDOM... ONLY US."
- Ad in Jakarta Post, should have read Condo

"I didn't know Onward Christian Soldiers was a Christian song."
- Aggie Pate, at a non-denominational mayor's breakfast, Fort Worth, Texas

"I invented the internet".
- Al Gore, former U.S. Vice President

"I didn't realize I was in a Buddhist temple."
- Al Gore, former U.S. Vice President when asked about his illegal fundraising activities that took place in a Buddhist temple.

"Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious."
- Alan Minter, Boxer

"I think that the film Clueless was very deep. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it's true lightness."
- Alicia Silverstone, Actress

"See the New York Jets play the Cinncinnati Bagels this Sunday on NBC."
- Announcer on WNBC station

"How to store your baby walker: First, remove baby."
- Anonymous Manufacturer

"Traffic is very heavy at the moment, so if you are thinking of leaving now, you'd better set off a few minutes earlier."
- Anonymous Traffic Report

"This is no longer a slum neighborhood. I haven't heard of a Cubs fan being shot in a long time."
- Anonymous Wrigley Field Neighbor, Chicago, IL

"During the scrimmage, Tarkanian paced the sideline with his hands in his pockets while biting his nails."
- AP report describing Fresno State basketball coach Jerry Tarkanian

"We are unable to announce the weather. We depend on weather reports from the airport, which is closed, due to weather. Whether we will be able to give you a weather report tomorrow will depend on the weather."
- Arab News report 
 

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